top of page
Writer's pictureMark Bird

'I Always Play The Christmas Tree' Funny Nativity Poem for Kids

Updated: 10 hours ago

I based this funny Christmas nativity poem for kids on an old joke from school. I better not say too much in case I give the ending away.


Can you guess the ending of this nativity poem for kids before you get to it?



Child Dressed As A Christmas Tree
I Always Play The Christmas Tree - Funny Christmas Nativity Poem for Kids




I Always Play The Christmas Tree

 

Every Christmas since Year 3

when we do Nativity

why does every teacher see

I’m only good for playing trees

 

Never had a single line

Draped in crêpe to play a pine

Wound in tissue-paper twine

My painted face, a shade of slime

 

Loo roll angels on my head

Ping pong baubles dangle red

No one ever hears me beg

Oh can’t I play the cow instead

 

Now though made of sterner stuff

I’m Year 6, I’ve had enough

Got a plan, I’m really chuffed

Tonight I’ll be a cut above

 

Play the part I want to be

that in all Nativities

I often hear but never see

tonight that part belongs to me …

 

On the stage, I stand and wait

Grinning, I anticipate

How the crowd, I’ll captivate

How teachers will all gasp, He’s great!

 

Entering from stage left, they stir

Three wise men, without a word

bearing gifts of gold and myrrh

and I’m about to play the third

 

Shuffling to the front, I tear

loo roll angels from my hair

Throwing crêpe into the air

until at last, I’m standing there

 

Stitches scarred across my brow

Glaring with a green-faced scowl

Shepherds scream beneath tea towels

my bolted neck makes Mary howl

 

Finally I say my line:

Baby Jesus so divine

guided by a star that shines

I come here bearing Frankenstein


Mark Bird



Nativity stable scene with three wise men and Frankenstein
Frankincense Not Frankenstein - Funny Christmas Nativity Poem for Kids

Cartoon by Peter Nesbit


Share your own funny Christmas nativity poem for kids in the Comments below.

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


bottom of page